Studying abroad can be one of the most exciting and enriching experiences in your life. But coming home can be one of the most confusing and frustrating. You’re happy to be home and see your family and friends. You finally have a car again and you know where everything is. So why are you not happy to be home?
There are several factors that can cause us to feel these emotions.
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Life seems “boring” at home, not as exciting as your host country. Sometimes this happens because we take for granted all there is to do at home because it’s always been there. And, at home we have all the responsibilities that we didn’t have when we were abroad.
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Things may have changed while you were gone. Don’t expect everybody and everything to stay the same just because you weren’t there. Your friends and family have lives apart from you and they continued to develop, changing jobs, moving, falling in and out of love, etc. And it seems that nobody wants to listen to your experiences or look at all the photos you have taken. They’re more interested in telling you what they did while you were gone.
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You miss all the friends you made during your study abroad experience. They understood what you were going through, while no one at home does.
You may not notice how the routine, norms and values of your host country have become part of you. Whether it is speaking in another language or eating different foods, you are used to doing things a certain way and now are expected to pick up American habits again. After having been exposed to a different culture, some of the customs you never paid attention to before seem very strange. Some students commonly react to the faster pace of life, a perception of superficiality in interactions, and the favoring of individuality over sense of community. You may feel quite frustrated at first over these conflicting attitudes and values. You are fortunate to know two value systems now and can choose which values to incorporate into your life.
The important thing for you to realize is that these feelings are normal. Each person who studies abroad has a different reaction to the experience, so don’t compare yourself with your friends who studied abroad with you. And remember there are resources on campus to help you. Your study abroad advisors have all experienced this to some extent themselves and can provide some good coping mechanisms. Counseling Services can also help you as you go through this process.